


The Awakening World

by HowlingArmadillo



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Abuse, Apocalypse, Coming of Age, Death, F/M, Gen, Neglect, Rebirth, SBURB, Time Travel
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-04-23
Updated: 2017-05-08
Packaged: 2018-06-04 01:59:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 6
Words: 16,819
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6636538
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HowlingArmadillo/pseuds/HowlingArmadillo
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Eight young adults end up in the fight of their lives as the game they're playing turns out to have consequences far beyond anything they ever imagined. They must learn to adapt quickly as they find themselves fighting in a timeless war of destruction and renewal. The birth of a new universe is at stake as the people of Derse rise to impede them, but the greatest dangers of all come from their fellow players...</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Aileen Walker

**Author's Note:**

> Oh look, it's this thing. This is a story I was originally working on back before Blood Pride became my everything fanfiction wise, but now that it's done and Skyward Sniper is hitting all kinds of walls I've decided to restart it.
> 
> Let me just say this now in case the tags didn't make this clear: unless they're a carapacian, none of the Homestuck characters have a chance of showing up in this story. This is 100% original Howling Armadillo material. Except for everything I took from Hussie. Which is most of the things.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Aileen suddenly finds herself with nothing to do.

A young woman stands in her bedroom. While it is typical for the narrative to state that today just so happens to be her birthday it would seem that in this case the narrator has shown up a day late! Indeed, rather than arriving on the very day that this young woman turns seventeen years old, the narrator has chosen to show up on the day that she turns seventeen and one day old, which he will freely admit isn’t nearly as dramatic.

Being seventeen, this woman has already been gifted with the name AILEEN WALKER for four years and one day of her life, and has long since abandoned any rude monikers such as COMPULSIVE VACILLATOR. Indeed, she would be downright offended to hear such a thing!

Aileen is a cheerful individual with an athletic build, standing five feet and eight inches tall. She favors the color YELLOW, a bright shade that matches her intensely vivid eyes, and wears a blouse in that color to reflect as much. She also dresses in jeans, and in order to reflect her LATEST OBSESSION, she has a white t-shirt with a circle divided into many differently colored slices across the front, in a style somewhat reminiscent of a GAME SPINNER. Her hair is black, shoulder length, and kept tied up in a ponytail, a style many find to be reminiscent of HER MOTHER. Her only available footwear at the moment consists of hiking boots, a fact that she will later be EXTREMELY THANKFUL FOR.

At the moment however, Aileen is not using hiking boots, and in fact wants nothing to do with hiking at all. Hiking was what she spent her free time doing two weeks ago, after all. She’s already climbed every mountain within biking distance, which is a considerable number given her home on the WEST COAST OF CANADA. As far as Aileen is concerned, it’s time to move on to bigger and better things!

Indeed, the new thing with which Aileen has chosen to fill her life is GAME SHOWS. She has spent the last few weeks memorizing trivia, studying various challenges, and deciding which show she will be taking part in! And after all of her research, she has chosen to set her sights on the pinnacle: JEOPARDY.

Unfortunately, Aileen has discovered recently that JEOPARDY no longer allows CANADIANS to participate. Indeed, her new dream has been shattered before she could even attempt to complete it, and now she’s feeling rather DIRECTIONLESS. This is a rather big deal, as this happens to be Aileen’s most despised feeling of all!

Now, what is a directionless young girl of seventeen to do?

For the moment, she decides to start by examining her room, which is filled with a mess of things from so many hobbies it’s a wonder that one person could be responsible for them. A pair of boxing gloves hangs from her closet door. A set of antlers sits crudely attached to a plaque, a find from one of her aforementioned hiking trips. A shelf full of various models sits beside the window. A bound journal containing a stamp collection gathers dust on the shelf below it.

At this point it quickly becomes clear that to list the locations of her various knick-knacks would take us several more pages, so instead we’ll spend the remainder of this paragraph listing some of the other hobbies that have left their mark upon Aileen’s room. Knitting, Calligraphy, Amateur Radio, Candle Making, Tabletop Gaming, DJing, Gardening, Jujutsu, Practical Joking, Skateboarding, Animal Care, Gambling, Taekwondo, Water Polo, Kite Flying, Base Jumping, Horseback Riding, Wrestling, Scrapbooking, Acting, Ballroom Dancing, Archeology, Break Dancing, Whittling, Metalworking, Video Gaming, and Movie Watching. All but a few of these have only been an obsession of hers for a few weeks before NEVER BEING TOUCHED AGAIN, hence the reason why the past few paragraphs have been suspiciously devoid of capital letters.

Put simply, none of the items in Aileen’s room mean anything to her anymore. They are relics, items of a bygone age in which she actually liked whatever activity they are involved with. And Aileen has never been one for looking back (Or cleaning up after herself). This means that there’s only one thing left to do: go online and find something new to obsess over.

There are precisely three things in Aileen’s room that see regular use: her bed, her closet, and her computer. Of these three things, the computer is by far the most important to her. Without the Internet Aileen’s repertoire of things to do would be shockingly limited, especially for somebody who changes hobbies as frequently as she does.

Luckily in this case, Aileen has no need to find a new hobby. The primary reason for this will be made abundantly clear later on when a mysterious package arrives at her doorstep, but for now this is because she has friends to catch up with!

Aileen uses Pesterchum for all of her online communication needs, as exactly everybody reading this already expected. Were she aware that her tastes were being so easily predicted though, she would likely switch to a different program out of principle. You don’t spend as much time switching your tastes around as Aileen does without growing a strange sense of pride in being unpredictable.

Thankfully Aileen is blissfully unaware that her actions are being logged in any way, and thus we can be spared the dreadful hassle of watching as she switches to a different chat client. This is really for the best, as without this chat client she’d never be able to speak to her friends in time to prepare for what’s to come!

The narrator would like to take a minute to acknowledge that he’s aware that being coy is rather moot, as everyone knows where this story is going in these early stages. That said, he refuses to stop dancing around the subject, because that’s simply how these things are done!

While the narrator is busy dismissing the entirely valid concerns of his readers, Aileen is busy catching up on the messages she’s been sent in the past twenty-four hours. Most of said messages are from people she knows from school, and as such they are rather pointless, since Aileen spoke to most of them in person just yesterday. There are, however, a few which stand out, as the senders are people whom Aileen knows only online, and has in fact never met in person!

\-- goldenGauntlet [GG] began pestering worthyVenture [WV] at 12:24 ONE day(s) ago--

GG: Looks like you pulled away from me once again!  
GG: Your lead is slight, yet I can never seem to catch up!  
GG: I’ll let it slide this time, but you mark my words one day I will surpass you.  
GG: One as incredible as myself could never stand for anything less!  
GG: …  
GG: Seriously though, happy birthday. Hope it was great!

\-- helmedBloodline [HB] began pestering worthyVenture [WV] at 9:32 ONE day(s) ago--

HB: Informed by GG today is your birthday.  
HB: Best wishes.

\-- panophobicMortician [PM] began pestering worthyVenture [WV] at 16:13 ONE day(s) ago--

PM: Hey, umm, I know it’s not like we talk much.  
PM: But I figured since it’s a special occasion I should probably wish you a happy birthday.  
PM: This is weird, isn’t it?  
PM: Geez, I’m sorry to have bothered you!

Aileen can only smile as she looks over these last few messages. She can count on one hand the number of times she’s talked to PM and HB, but despite how… odd they are they still took the time to message her. With those two any communication at all is a big deal. Meanwhile, GG is treating age like a contest. Again. That guy is so weird!

Aileen types up a few brief responses before preparing to surf the web, but the sight of a name in her friends list she’s not used to seeing stops her. She can’t help but grin, this guy is never online these days!

\-- worthyVenture [WV] began pestering automotiveCanine [AC] at 8:42 --

WV: YOU!  
WV: Where the heck have you been?  
AC: Oh, hey Aileen, it’s been a while.  
AC: I’ve been… the same place as always, really.  
AC: Just busy.  
WV: Work? Or Caleb?  
AC: As usual, it’s a little of both.  
AC: Between Caleb and my customers it’s often hard to tell who’s more needy.  
WV: I can imagine.  
WV: Still though!  
WV: It’s been like three months!  
WV: What kind of work is keeping you so busy?  
AC: Honestly it’s mostly the bikes.  
WV: Do you even charge for bikes?  
AC: If I did I’m sure somebody would try to press charges against me.  
AC: You know how it is.  
AC: I can never play with Caleb, so as far as I’m concerned seeing him get out of the garage is reward enough for my work.  
AC: He handles the kids, I handle the bikes. That way everyone wins.  
WV: Even though you lose out on time spent on paying jobs?  
AC: Eh. I like bikes. They’re simple. Plus I feel good helping the kids.  
WV: Such a softie!  
AC: Ha! Say it all you want, nobody will ever believe you.  
WV: Pretty much everyone I talk to believes it.  
AC: Everyone online has no idea what I look like.  
AC: In person I’ve been told I’m terrifying.  
WV: Doubt it. You’re just a big old softie who fixes bicycles for children and dotes on his precious Caleb all day.  
AC: I’ll take that as a complement.  
WV: It was a compliment, haha!  
WV: So anyways, why aren’t you working today?  
AC: No huge secret to it. I saw a chance to finish work early yesterday, so I wrapped my last project up and decided to take a weekend off.  
AC: Unless the kids stop by I was planning to just spend the day with Caleb.  
WV: No time for me?  
AC: We’re talking aren’t we?  
WV: Hahaha, fair point.  
AC: So what about you?  
AC: You still doing… what was it, synchronized swimming?  
WV: That old thing? Ha, no way.  
WV: I have moved on to bigger and better things.  
WV: Three times as it happens.  
AC: Three?  
AC: Geez, you’re getting bored even faster than usual.  
WV: You think so?  
AC: You used to give things a few months at least, right?  
WV: I don’t know, it varies.  
WV: I spent most of the past few months hiking. Tried needlepoint for like a day. Then I wanted to go on Jeopardy until today when I found out Canadians aren’t allowed on anymore.  
AC: Damn you Trebek.  
WV: Haha, yeah, so dumb!  
AC: So you’re between jobs then huh?  
WV: Very funny.  
WV: But yes.  
WV: I need to find something new to do with my time.  
AC: Aren’t you coming close to exams? Maybe you should just focus on that for now.  
AC: The timing’s convenient enough.  
WV: I suppose…  
AC: That or you could wait for your mom.  
WV: My mom?  
AC: She’s got that weird psychic sense where she knows when you’re out of stuff to do, right?  
AC: Maybe she’ll buy you something for your birthday.  
AC: That’s coming up soon, right?  
WV: Approximately 364 days from now, yes.  
AC: …  
AC: …  
AC: Aww shit!  
WV: Dude…  
AC: Shit, I fucked up!  
WV: It’s alright, calm down.  
AC: It’s not alright, I forgot your birthday!  
WV: Damnit I forgot you get like this.  
AC: Like what? Like a birthday forgetting asshole?  
WV: You know like what damnit.  
AC: Don’t care! I suck!  
WV: Seriously, just forget it, it’s okay.  
WV: I was just joking around, I’m not upset or anything.  
AC: But that’s seriously not cool of me!  
AC: I can’t believe I just forgot like that!

Aileen sits back and sighs as AC continues to rant. He’ll be fine in a minute or so; he just needs to get it out of his system. Knowing the schedule he keeps, Aileen’s almost certain that he’s been working ungodly hours to earn this day off. It’s a wonder he can even stay conscious sometimes.

Yup, he’s still going. Aileen figures it’ll be another minute or so before he gets his head on straight again. He always obsesses over the smallest things, it’s ridiculous.

Aileen pauses in thought as she hears the doorbell. It’s probably somebody trying to sell something, not worth the trouble. Her mom’s on the other side of the country, so the chances are good that whoever’s visiting has no good reason to be here. Which means Aileen has no good reason to answer the door.

…Except that she’s still waiting for AC to calm the fuck down from his sleep deprived rant about the importance of birthdays…

Front door it is.

Aileen leaves her room calmly, making her way down the hall towards the door. She pauses to frown at the sight of one of her old paintings hung on the wall, from a time when she tried to learn how abstract was supposed to work. Now that she’s old enough to know abstract isn’t really supposed to work at all she feels rather ashamed of it, but for whatever reason her mom is quite fond of the drawing.

The painting depicts two orbs, one red, on green, set against a black background. In the bottom corners the orbs each trail away into a sort of spiral, which diminishes into nothing. It reminds her now of stars, being dragged into a void on jets of fire.

Looks kinda ugly though.

By the time Aileen stops staring at her not so abstract painting, she’s far too late to catch whoever was at the door. She throws open the door to find that there’s nobody there at all.

There are, however, two packages. Both seem to be from her mother, and have notes attached. “Open this if you don’t know about Jeopardy yet”, and “Open this if you already know about Jeopardy.”

Okay, Aileen’s always joked about how her mother seems to have psychic powers when it comes to her gift giving skills, but this is freaky even for her. At any rate Aileen has no intention of revisiting some stupid fascination from twenty minutes ago, so she decide to leave the first package alone. She is up to date on her ability to participate in Jeopardy. She leaves package one on her bed and turns her attention to package two.

It appears to be some sort of game, one Aileen’s honestly never heard of before. She looks the case over, but can’t seem to find anything to help her properly identify what sort of game it actually is. All she has as reference is the title, and an image of a house divided into eight sections.

In the end Aileen takes both packages into the room with her, and sits back at her computer. She’s relieved to see that AC is no longer assaulting her with messages, and has basically got a handle on his shit again.

AC: Okay, I’m back, sorry.  
AC: Had to go vent. Hit something with a hammer.  
AC: You know how it is.  
AC: Aileen? You there?  
WV: Yeah, I’m here, sorry.  
WV: Had to answer the door.  
WV: Looks like you were right, my mom seems to have pulled through.  
AC: Oh yeah? What did she give you?  
WV: Not entirely sure.  
WV: You ever hear of a game called SBURB before?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Between this and my first draft from like two years back I gotta say I'm feeling pretty damn good about this one. 
> 
> I know that so far this looks suspiciously similar to the original material. Different characters, same story, it happens all too often. Let me just say though, things will look different soon enough. These characters are my babies, and I have put way more thought into this fic than I probably should have. So bear with me here.
> 
> Let me just ask now while we're just getting started. If you read this please comment. Seriously, it's pretty damned important that I get feedback, and I know that with an OC story I'm fighting one hell of an uphill battle to get anybody to read this. But I want to write this. I really want to make this work. So please help me out here. Views are great but they could mean anything. What I need is actual feedback. I'll even throw out some questions to make it easy for you.
> 
> Do you like the characters so far?
> 
> Am I being descriptive enough?
> 
> Am I being too descriptive?
> 
> How motivated are you to read more?
> 
> There. In fanfiction terms I am practically whoring myself out here, so toss a few metaphorical bucks my way, alright? Thanks for reading, people!


	2. Cruxtruder

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Aileen starts playing the game and suddenly finds stakes rising faster than she can handle.

goldenGauntlet [GG] opened memo on board FISTS OF GLORY.

GG: Holy crap AC is online.  
GG: People.  
GG: AC is online!  
GG: Do you know what this means!?  
denizenDormant [DD] responded to memo.  
DD: Uhh… He got a day off?  
GG: Exactly!  
GG: And do you know what that means?  
DD: He’s learned not to overwork himself.  
GG: What?  
GG: No, that’s crazy dude, come on.  
tenderConsideration [TC] responded to memo.  
TC: Knowing him, he’ll be spending all day playing with Caleb.  
GG: A very good guess!  
TC: Yay!  
GG: But not this time!  
TC: Boo!  
DD: You know what he’s up to then?  
GG: I do!  
GG: I’ve seen it!  
TC: You’ve seen it?  
TC: Come on man, even I’m not that good.  
GG: Which simply means I’m better!  
TC: >:(  
GG: The three of us, AC, WV, HB, and PM have all been online today at least once!  
TC: Wait, really?  
TC: Wow, that’s pretty rare.  
TC: All we need is TA and we’ll have the full gang.  
GG: It’s more than just rare.  
GG: It’s never happened before.  
GG: Which means today is the day!  
DD: What are you on about?  
GG: The day I ascend to greatness!  
DD: Oh of course, should have guessed.  
GG: The day I become legendary!  
DD: Only you would get you this worked up.  
GG: The day I finally earn my place in the golden city of my dreams!  
DD: Don’t know why I even bother coming to your stupid memos, it’s always the same with you.  
GG: I’m going to go get ready! I’ll see you all there!  
DD: Wait, what?  
GG ceased responding to memo.  
DD: Okay, what the hell is he on about this time?  
TC: No idea.

While everyone who isn’t a Homestuck reader tries to work out what the hell GG is on about this time, Aileen is busy not caring about it. It should of course be noted that this apathy is less the result of a callous attitude, and more the result of simply not knowing that GG is going on about anything in the first place.

No, rather than worrying about the online shenanigans of her friends, Aileen is attempting to engage in online shenanigans of her own. And she’s starting by trying to figure out just what the heck her mom sent her.

AC: Not exactly big on games in general Aileen.  
AC: That’s definitely Leon’s thing.  
WV: True…  
WV: Pretty sure Leon can’t stand me though.  
AC: Leon can’t stand most people.  
WV: Also true.  
AC: Pretty sure he tolerates us more than most people.  
WV: Only because we tolerate him.  
AC: Touché.  
WV: Anyways, I’d really rather not talk to Leon.  
WV: I’ll just look it up.  
AC: Don’t bother, I’m already checking.  
AC: Looks like some kind of online game.  
AC: Seems pretty popular, involves home design and... I guess fighting?  
AC: Okay, it’s pretty unclear.  
AC: Looks like it’s pretty difficult, nobody can seem to get anywhere.  
AC: Also there’s people pissed off because there’s no 1-player mode.  
AC: You need two people at least to…  
WV: Go on.  
AC: What have I just walked into?  
WV: I think you know what you just walked into.  
AC: No.  
WV: No you don’t know, or no you won’t play with me?  
AC: The second one.  
AC: Aileen, I don’t even have a copy.  
WV: You and I both know it can be downloaded.  
AC: I told you not to bother looking it up.  
WV: Well I did anyways, and now you’ve got no excuse.  
AC: I have plenty of excuses.  
WV: See, normally that would be true, but I happen to know that today you don’t have any work to do.  
WV: Just you and Caleb alone in the house all day.  
AC: Which was the idea behind my taking a day off in the first place.  
WV: Oh come on!  
WV: Caleb’s big enough to look after himself; we both know he’s the more responsible one in your relationship.  
AC: It’s sad that I can’t even deny that.  
WV: Just for a little while, come on!  
AC: Ugh… fine.  
AC: I’ll give you two hours.  
AC: Only because I know you’ll never let me hear the end of it otherwise.  
WV: I’ll take it!  
AC: All right, I’ll start the download, I guess.  
AC: Not sure why your mom got a physical copy of a free game, btw.  
WV: Pretty sure computers aren’t her thing.  
WV: She just hires people to deal with that stuff.  
WV: Brb, gonna get something to eat while this thing downloads.  
AC: Take your time, my computer is pretty slow.

Aileen can’t help but grin in anticipation, as she jumps up so quickly that she knocks her chair over. She pauses at the disturbance, eying the antlers on her wall cautiously. The wobble a bit, but stay properly mounted. Damn things have been falling off ever since she put them up there.

Well her room may still be a disaster, but at least one thing is staying where it belongs. Even if it’s one of the many things in her room that she doesn’t care about. Aileen leaves her room confident in the fact that this will continue to be the case for the remainder of her day.

Now that she’s got something to do other than bemoan her inability to participate in Jeopardy Aileen is feeling much better about life. She has far less distracting her, and is instead focusing on this game about fighting and house building.

The building aspect in particular has allowed us all a good opportunity to look at Aileen’s home, as details that would normally be taken for granted about her house are suddenly objects of interest and therefore are near the forefront of her psyche. While hardly luxurious, Aileen’s house is decidedly UPPER CLASS. It sits on the top of a STEEP CLIFF, looking out over the PACIFIC OCEAN. The view she gets of the sunset is as blindingly beautiful as it just plain blinding. For now however, it is still early morning, and the sun is still hidden behind the trees in front of her house.

Aileen’s room sits in a hallway to the right of the front entrance. Further along this same hallway is the bathroom, followed by her mother’s room, likely collecting dust. The front door itself opens into a small entrance, with stairs into the basement by the mouth of the hall. Across from the front door is a sitting room that sees no use whatsoever, because nobody ever comes over to visit. The dining room that sits next to the sitting room and the entrance is in a similar state of disuse.

Indeed, there’s a vast empty void of wasted space in between Aileen’s room and the kitchen, which happens to be the only other room in the house that sees use. The kitchen is surprisingly small for such a large house, with a small table set up next to a television. One end of the kitchen leads out to a front patio, while the other has a hallway leading out to the garage.

The fridge is filled mostly with pizza from Aileen’s job making deliveries. Despite her mother’s skill in buying excellent gifts, she is woefully inept at keeping the fridge stocked. This is rather understandable, as Aileen’s mother likely hasn’t used her fridge in several years.

An empty fridge. An empty house. One does not need to look hard to see that these could easily be metaphors for a life that is equally empty. Aileen stands in the aftermath of her seventeenth birthday and finds herself once again pursuing something new. For all her time spent learning skills and hobbies Aileen has never been able to remove herself from the absence of purpose in her life. It is a feeling that has followed her as long as she has been self-aware: the knowledge that she is destined for something. There is a reason for her to walk this earth, and she has never been able to find it. 

Could today be the day she discovers that purpose? Unlikely. Aileen is not so naïve as to assume a simple video game will bring more to her life than a few hours of enjoyment. But those few hours will be spent with a friend she rarely talks to, and this game will be enough to take her mind off the doldrums that so often follows her. 

And so there is merit enough in pursuing this, for however fleeting a time it may last.

Aileen retrieves a few slices of pizza and after a moment of deliberation chooses to eat them cold. She returns to her room with her prize and is thrilled to see the game finally booting up on her laptop.

WV: Okay it’s starting up now!  
WV: This music is pretty catchy.  
AC: Yeah, it’s not bad.  
AC: The game seems to be running pretty smoothly on my computer too.  
AC: Usually the popular games flip the fuck out just trying to start an installer.  
WV: I suppose it must be popular for a reason.  
AC: I guess so.  
WV: Alright, so this game has two roles: you’re the host, and I’m the client.  
WV: I’m pretty sure the client’s role is much more involved, so I figured I should handle that one.  
AC: Is that all there is to it?  
WV: Well I think eventually you’re supposed to be the client for either me or somebody else, but since you’re only playing for a couple of hours, we’ll stick to this for now.  
AC: Thanks.  
WV: No problem, we’re here to have fun after all.  
AC: Well then, I’ll endeavor to have as much fun with this as I can in the two hours provided me.  
WV: That’s the spirit!  
WV: …  
WV: Okay, so… I’m not at all sure what I’m supposed to be doing here.  
AC: It looks like you’ve done plenty already!  
WV: ?  
AC: I see what you meant when you said that the client is much more involved.  
AC: How did you even manage to put this all together so fast?  
AC: Did you pick it from a template?  
WV: Dude. I literally haven’t done anything.  
AC: Then what’s up with the little room I’m looking at here?  
AC: See, it’s got a bed and everything.  
AC: Is it not appearing on your screen?

Aileen freezes in confusion as she sees movement out of the corner of her eye. There seems to be some sort of house hovering over her bed. Aileen has barely enough time to register that the house looks like the icon on the cover of her game before suddenly her bed is being carried away.

“What the heck?” Aileen ponders aloud, staring in abject confusion as her bed is carried through the ceiling. She ponders on the house for another moment before the connection is made in her head. “The game?”

As soon as the house that Aileen has suddenly realized is a mouse cursor reappears in her room Aileen jumps into action. Using the skills she first learned from her time spent in at least a dozen different martial art classes, she leaps into the air and kicks the cursor aside, noting with both satisfaction and confusion that rather than fly through the wall again it simply hits the wall and bounces to the ground with a thud. 

Amazingly this fails to dislodge the antlers from their resting place, though Aileen’s stamp collection is obliterated. Thankfully Aileen’s stamp collection phase lasted all of a week, so she really only loses a couple bucks worth of postage.

Aileen wastes no time reflecting on the relics of hobbies past, instead rushing to her computer.

WV: Knock it off, jackass!  
AC: Oh, so you can see it now?  
AC: I was wondering how that little character kicked my cursor like that.  
WV: That’s not a character, that’s me.  
AC: Uhh… what?  
WV: I just kicked your cursor. It is appearing in my room right now.  
AC: That’s not even slightly possible.  
WV: I’m aware!  
AC: Like, it should be a gaming abstraction, right?  
AC: And also should not exist on the physical plane?  
WV: Maybe it works like a fetch modus?  
AC: I suppose that makes sense.  
AC: Though the kind of technology it would take…  
AC: Manipulating reality is something that a fetch modus exists for, but typically the modus only has dominion over it’s own pocket dimension.  
AC: Something like this… The game would have to somehow alter the entire house into a pocket dimension without changing its external properties in any perceivable way.  
AC: And this level of control is far beyond what most modus are capable of. They usually just work with basic programming.  
WV: I had no idea you were such an expert on this stuff.  
AC: I have had to disentangle fetch modus from people’s cars far more often than I’d like.  
AC: It’s ridiculously complicated.  
AC: You could count on one hand the number of people who can do that sort of work in Canada.  
WV: Well damn.  
WV: So I guess you’re like a specialty mechanic then?  
AC: Pretty much. Had to earn a living somehow, so I figured that shit out.  
AC: Nothing gets you business like being the only one capable of doing a job.  
AC: Anyways, my point is that fetch modus of this level don’t exist, which makes this far beyond any technology seen by the public… ever.  
AC: Seriously, I wouldn’t be surprised if somebody lost their job over this game.  
WV: Hardcore.  
AC: Yup.  
AC: Makes me wonder what else this game can do.  
WV: I’m not sure I want to find out at this point.  
AC: Hey, we already agreed on two hours, right?  
AC: Plenty of time to fix things up after we’ve looked things over.  
WV: I guess…  
WV: Can I mess up your house afterwards?  
AC: Hell no.  
AC: Maybe you forgot, but I run my business out of my house.  
WV: Fair enough, I guess.  
AC: Look, it’s fine.  
AC: I’m just going to put something down here.  
AC: Out in that sitting room you’re always saying doesn’t get used.  
AC: Here, I’ll use this… cruxtruder thing.  
AC: Go check it out.

Aileen turns around just as she hears the loud thud of something massive crashing in the sitting room. She’s half tempted to turn back and tell him to stop breaking shit, but decides to simply carry on instead. It’s enough to make Aileen wish that she had some sort of portable computer, but unfortunately her phone is a cheap piece of shit without internet functions.

When she steps into the sitting room Aileen sees a massive metal machine almost as tall as she is, almost as wide as her bed and… honestly far too irritating for the narrator to continue to describe. He’s not going to sit here and try to convey what this shit looks like in text, because quite frankly these devices look ridiculous. If there’s anybody reading this who doesn’t remember which stupid looking machine the cruxtruder is then they should look it up.

Aileen, however, does not have the benefit of having read Homestuck before, and is quite frankly, completely baffled by whatever the fuck is in front of her. She tries turning the wheel near the top of the device only to find that the lid seems to be stuck on.

“I guess I’ll get something to pry this off…” Aileen mutters, before heading into the garage and grabbing a crowbar. She stops in the kitchen to grab another slice of pizza, before returning to the cruxtruder and getting ready to pry the lid off the device.

She stops for a moment as she looks to the side and sees her laptop has been moved onto a couch nearby, the cursor lying on the floor. She stares at the cursor for a moment, before deciding she should probably check what’s going on.

WV: I’m assuming you’ve got something important to talk about since you brought me my laptop.  
AC: Yeah… Kinda.  
AC: I was going to tell you that my move cursor isn’t working very well right now.  
AC: But then I moved your laptop…  
AC: And now it’s not working at all.  
WV: Wait, so you can’t put things back?  
AC: Uhh… pretty much.  
AC: I think it got messed up when you kicked it.  
WV: Wait, so this is my fault?  
AC: Partially?  
WV: You’re dead later.  
WV: Right after I finish messing with this thing.  
AC: Cruxtruder.  
WV: Yes.  
AC: If it makes you feel better my other cursors are still working fine.  
WV: There’s more than one?  
AC: I’ve got one for moving stuff, one for changing stuff, and one for placing stuff.  
AC: Please don’t kick the other ones.  
WV: I think kicking the first one caused me enough trouble.  
WV: Hold on, gonna smash this thing with a crowbar.  
AC: My sighs are very audible right now Aileen.

Aileen turns aside to face the cruxtruder and readies her crowbar. At first she was considering prying the lid loose, but looking again she thinks she can get it to open by hitting it. 

Swinging her crowbar as hard as she can causes the device to shift, but not quite enough, so Aileen ends up jumping in the air and bringing the crowbar down with all the energy she can muster. The lid makes a clicking noise, before exploding off with enough force to bounce off the ceiling. A large crystalline cylinder follows shortly afterwards, and behind that, a large golden ball of light, with a flashing spirograph pattern in its core.

But while those are all certainly things worthy of notice, Aileen’s attention is drawn more towards the numbers.

7:31

7:30

7:29

WV: Uhh, dude?  
WV: Why is there a countdown?  
AC: Countdown?  
AC: Oh, on the cruxtruder.  
AC: Yeah, I see it.  
AC: Let me just look online here…  
AC: Huh.  
AC: Damn.  
AC: Okay, I’m dropping the rest of the stuff.  
WV: Dude?  
AC: I am going to be frank here; I have no idea what any of this stuff does.  
AC: But I think we need to find out.  
WV: Why. What does the countdown mean?  
AC: Well, from the looks of things it seems to mean people are about to start dying.  
AC: Don’t look out your window.  
AC: Actually do that.  
AC: Look out your window.  
AC: Let’s make sure this is taken as seriously as possible.  
AC: So we can figure this shit out immediately.  
AC: And not fucking panic.  
WV: Rod, please talk to me.  
AC: Aileen, I’m not sure what the fuck is going on with this fucking game but the stuff I’m reading on line is pretty fucking intense.  
AC: There are people trying to write walkthroughs that are just dissolving into last will and testaments.  
AC: I am reading a guy crying to his mother via video game walkthrough, and this shit is freaking me out.  
AC: Did you look outside yet?

Aileen manages to tear her view away from her laptop, and makes her way rapidly out to the balcony. The orb of light dodges around her and seems to zip away into a different part of the house, but she pays it no mind.

Metaphors once again rise to the surface, as Aileen stands upon a precipice. The ocean below her seems to crash against the rocks with a greater intensity than she feels is normal. The sun is still rising behind her, casting a golden glow across the ocean as it rises above the trees. Yet this golden glow pales in comparison to a different light above her. A burning ball of fire shines above, distant, yet no less intense in its luminosity. There is little doubt in Aileen’s mind that it is heading her way.

The cliff crumbles in the face of the waves. A counter dwindles. Aileen stands on her balcony, high above the ocean yet no less in danger for it. Before her is an ocean of fire, while above her certain doom approaches. That which was once beautiful takes on the appearance of hell in the face of mortal peril.

Aileen’s search for purpose is over. Instead, something greater and more terrible than she ever dreamed has been thrust upon her. The sun rises. Time grows short.

What will she do?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So little emphasis is put upon the humble cruxtruder, yet it is the device by which all is begun. And therefore, is the device by which all is undone. In a way, smashing it open could be seen as a twisted form of catharsis, violence enacted upon the device that brings reality crashing down in the most surreal way imaginable. If the players knew what breaking this open would do, I imagine they'd take far more pleasure in the moment of violence required to use it.
> 
> Thanks for reading. Please comment. Love you all in the most beautiful of platonic ways one can imagine.


	3. Collapse

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Aileen struggles to save her house from destruction.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> At the request of a reader, I'm gonna give you a quick bit of info here regarding text colors, since that's way more sensible than waiting for every character to get their full introduction.  
> worthyVenture [WV] uses bright yellow text.  
> automotiveCanine [AC] uses orange text.  
> goldenGauntlet [GG] uses pale blue text.  
> denizenDormant [DD] uses light grey text  
> tenderConsideration [TC] uses forest green text.  
> tranquilAnte [TA] uses violet text.  
> helmedBloodline [HB] uses brown text.  
> panophobicMortician [PM] uses dull red text.  
> Naturally, these also correspond with their eye color.

tranquilAnte [TA] responded to memo.  
TA: Hey guys, what’s up?  
DD: Oh great, TA is online.  
DD: You should go hide yourself before GG sees you.  
TA: GG?  
TA: Did I do something to make him mad?  
DD: Oh he’s mad, alright.  
DD: He’s mad about all of us.  
DD: Seems to think that his latest ascent to greatness will rely on whether we’re all online.  
TA: Huh… yeah he seems really worked up.  
TA: He only talks about the city when he’s really excited.  
DD: Those stupid dreams of his, I swear to god.  
TA: What did he mean by get ready?  
TC: Pushups, sit-ups, shadow boxing, and chanting to himself.  
TA: You sure?  
TC: It’s how he prepares for all his big matches.  
TC: Knowing his usual schedule he’s worked up to shadow boxing now.  
TC: He’ll do the chants while taking a cold shower to wash the sweat away.  
DD: You know way too much about his shower habits.  
TC: Eww, don’t make it weird.  
TC: I’m sure he’s gone over his ‘routine for personal greatness’ plenty of times with you too.  
DD: I usually tune people out when they start preaching about exercise to me.  
goldenGauntlet [GG] has responded to memo.  
GG: Right on all counts, CT!  
GG: I’m impressed!  
TC: I guess it just goes to show that I’m better after all!  
GG: I’ll concede this one time.  
GG: I had a rather unfair advantage in the first place.  
DD: So you still say that you physically saw what Rod is doing today.  
DD: Either you’re a stalker, or you’re both crazy and lucky at the same time.  
DD: Or you’re wrong, in which case you’re just crazy.  
GG: You’ll understand soon enough.  
GG: You’ll remember just who it is that you are doubting, and why that is a ridiculous thing to do.  
TA: I’m sure you have your non-creepy ways.  
DD: I doubt it.  
TC: For crying out loud, will you just take ten?  
TC: You’re being even more of an ass than usual.  
TA: Me?  
TC: No, not you, why do you always think you’re the one I’m ticked off at when somebody else starts freaking out?  
TA: Sorry.  
GG: Let’s all be calm and friendly here, teamwork will be important for us.  
DD: What team?  
GG: The team I’m about to get in touch with.  
GG: Right after a cold shower.  
TC: Called it!

Aileen at present could probably use a cold shower herself, though any application of cold water to her head would likely do the trick. Unlike those reading this story Aileen is oblivious to the narration, and as such is completely unaware of the fact that destiny is swiftly approaching. She’s still trying to process the meteor approaching at an equally swift pace.

Thankfully for her, she has a server player who is resourceful enough to take necessary steps to catch her attention. Aileen is swiftly shocked out of her reverie when a punch card is waved in front of her face. She reaches up to take the card, but finds that unlike the movement cursor, the cursor for deploying seems to be intangible. Instead, she waits for the card to be placed next to her, and moves back to her laptop with it in hand.

AC: Aileen.  
AC: Aileen!  
AC: Aileen, why the fuck am I trying to get your attention by typing in Pesterchum right now?  
AC: I’ve got these… things to wave around in front of you…  
AC: Huh. Okay, I guess the deployment cursor is actually a game abstraction or something?  
AC: Probably because it brings these items into the world?  
AC: Which means these items don’t even exist until they’re placed.  
AC: This game is breaking the laws of reality in enough ways to completely fuck with my head.  
AC: And it’s not like the laws of reality have been particularly stable since fetch modus were invented to begin with.  
AC: God damnit if they have to rewrite the laws of physics again over this game I’m gonna be pissed.  
WV: There is a meteor heading for my house.  
AC: Okay, so that’s real then.  
AC: The walkthroughs seem to mention this, but that’s still pretty goddamn unbelievable.  
AC: Keep an eye on that card, btw, it’s pretty damned important.  
WV: Looks simple enough to me.  
AC: Trust me, it’s one of like, five things I can place right now.  
AC: Here, let me drop something else…  
AC: Your room is a damn mess, I can’t place anything there…  
AC: This would be a lot easier if I could move things to make space.  
WV: Next time don’t abduct my damn bed.  
AC: It’s not abducted, it’s just on your roof.  
WV: You put my bed on the roof.  
AC: In my defense, I’ll remind you I didn’t know it was your real bed at the time.  
WV: Still mad.  
WV: Still about to die!  
WV: Shit, why are we still talking about this crap while there’s a meteor coming for my house?  
AC: Found a space. One… Totem Lathe coming up.  
AC: Nice to see a name here that makes sense.  
WV: I’ll take your word for it.  
WV: Where is it?  
AC: Downstairs hall.

Aileen captchalogues her card in her TRIVIA MODUS and heads for the basement. Whether her friend has dropped the means to her salvation from death by meteor remains to be seen, but he’s probably the most trustworthy guy she knows so she’s feeling pretty confident.

The machine is sitting right next to the stairs, and it reminds Aileen somewhat of her old sewing machine. The idea is immediately dismissed though, as AC seemed to be able to identify it, and there is no way he’d be caught dead sewing.

This then raises the question of what exactly the device is meant to be used for. She recognizes the term lathe as something related to factory work, but as to what she should do with it…

“Lathes are meant for cutting into something in a perfect circle.” Aileen muses to herself for another moment or two before the answer comes to her and she rushes upstairs for the cylinder that the cruxtruder spit out before. She pauses for just a moment to check her time limit.

4:23

4:22

4:21

She’s lost three minutes already. Time is running out.

Aileen is already feeling very over this game, though she’s fully aware she won’t be able to toss it aside as easily as her previous hobbies.

Aileen rushes downstairs in an instant, sliding to a stop before triggering her trivia modus in front of the totem lathe. The modus offers a prompt for her, with a three second cooldown. Aileen opens her mouth to speak, but realizes that she doesn’t actually know what the cylinder is called. “Uhh… Totem!” she blurts out desperately, and flinches as the sound of a buzzer rings in her ears. “Shit!”

According to the rules of her modus, she now has to wait fifteen seconds to try again. The modus requires Aileen to be quick witted, and while she can adjust the time she has to guess for next time, it would likewise increase the lockout period if she fails again. The one to five ratios remain constant no matter how she tampers with the settings.

With nothing else she can do at the moment Aileen decides to get help from the only person who can actually access game information at the moment, and retreats back upstairs. The timer runs out by the time she gets back to the front door, but her next guess, “crystal cylinder” is equally ineffective. Just like that, half a minute of precious time is lost.

AC: This last piece is pretty big; I can’t seem to find a place for it.  
AC: You should really clean your damn garage, this is disgraceful.  
WV: I don’t use my garage.  
AC: Don’t remind me.  
AC: I don’t see why none of my friends listen to me when I tell them.  
AC: No human being on this earth should be without a motorized vehicle.  
WV: Better for business that way, right?  
AC: There’s that.  
AC: But also.  
AC: Motorcycles are just so fucking awesome.  
WV: Well if I live to get my license I’ll take it under advisement.  
AC: Oh yeah, did you get the lathe to work?  
WV: I need that cylinder thing from the cruxtruder to work it, but I can’t get it out of my Sylladex without knowing the name of it.  
AC: Let’s see here…  
AC: Damn, there’s none of those in my inventory here, so I’m not sure I can check…  
AC: You said the cruxtruder spit out the first one?  
AC: Maybe you can get more?  
WV: Okay, I’ll check the cruxtruder, you see if you can find the name from your end.

Aileen grimaces as she looks back at the cruxtruder and sees the timer is now down to 3:27. The clock is almost certainly running fast, this is clearly the only possibility. She peers into the opening on top of the device and is thrilled to see that there is indeed another one of the totem below. She spins the wheel as hard as she can and sees not one, but three cylinders come out.

The first cylinder is captchalogged, only for Aileen to be reminded that under the terms for her modus, names aren’t shown. It’s irritating, but she can appreciate that there wouldn’t be too much point to it otherwise. She picks up the second one normally, and because they’re too big to carry in one hand she simply kicks the other one down the stairs.

2:58

2:57

AC: Oh right, if your bed is on the roof that should make some space.  
AC: Nope, there’s too much crap under there…

Aileen fits a cylinder into the lathe, only to realize that the machine needs some sort of input in order to know how to cut the machine! She searches around and finds a large slot. Perhaps the card from before will work… But her Sylladex denies her! Apparently she needs to be more specific than just using the term card…

Sylladex card doesn’t work either! It seems that even though they look similar this card is wholly physical and not some sort of strange abstraction. So what the heck is it called? 

AC: Oh wait, I can just make a room bigger here!  
AC: Let’s see…  
AC: Wait, are you…  
AC: Shit, please check this, it’s called a pre-punched card!  
AC: Thank god I can check the name of that one.

2:22  
2:21

Aileen does indeed check her email, and rushes down to use the card. She is starting to get the impression that the names for all of these game devices are rather stupidly technical. The machine takes a moment before carving the cylinder into a totem.

Aileen is just about to grab it when the last of the devices is placed, and the placing causes the entire house to shake.

AC: Son of a bitch.  
AC: I guess you can place these things in midair?  
AC: And they’re really fucking heavy, though I could already guess that just by looking.  
AC: I think I just trashed your mom’s office.  
AC: Also… everywhere else.  
AC: Your room is falling apart now too.  
AC: Those antlers are really… yup there they go.  
AC: Right into that weird strobe light thing.  
AC: Wait, what the fuck?

1:56

1:55

Aileen doesn’t bother checking to see what her friend is up to, instead rushing towards the sound of the initial drop. She passes the small room set aside for weight lifting, as well as the two guest bedrooms in the basement, and makes her way into the office.

Normally the office would be the picture of elegance, filled with assorted items from all over the world, as well as shelves full of books on law, politics, and the English language. There is a desk with an elegant leather desk chair, set to face out towards the ocean through a wide window. Though that window is currently a fair bit further away than it once was. AC did say he could change things with one of his cursors.

The floor space in this room has been rather drastically expanded, to make room for another machine. Aileen has no idea what to make of the thing, though the reader would likely immediately recognize it as an Alchemiter. She does however recognize the space where her carved totem is meant to go.

Fuck, apparently it’s just called a TOTEM. Of all the times for the game to stop being needlessly specific, it would be when Aileen’s already trying to adjust for it!

1:00

0:59

0:58

The machine scans the totem, and causes of all things a shining lamppost to appear. Aileen stares up at it in confusion. “What am I supposed to do with this?” Aileen cries out in a panic.

That’s when a golden ghost with the shape of a deer flies through her wall screeching incoherently, and Aileen dives for cover with a shriek, falling towards the window. She looks up in horror as the meteor sits clearly visible. It’s roughly the size of a small car, which is more than big enough to blow her house away when it lands.

“Oh man oh man oh man!” Aileen scrambles to her feet and turns back towards the lamppost. She has no idea what it’s supposed to do for her, but the deer ghost seems really worked up about it. “How is that going to help me though?” She yells in confusion.

0:38

0:37

She tries to find some sort of switch, but like any typical lamppost, it is not meant for public use and therefore can’t simply be turned on or off. She stares at it in further confusion, wondering if she should break it. It could save her life, but if that’s not how the thing is activated she’ll be completely doomed. The phone starts ringing, but Aileen pays it no mind, trying instead to find another way to turn the lamppost off.

AC: Aileen, what are you doing, that timer is running out!  
GG: ANSWER YOUR PHONE AILEEN.  
AC: Wait, how did you get in here?  
GG: She’s not on Pesterchum either?  
GG: Why can’t people be as clever as I am?  
GG: Wave your cursor around, get her to pay attention!  
AC: To the phone?  
AC: How do you even know about that?  
GG: Just do it dude!  
AC: Okay, sure!

0:13  
0:12

When Aileen sees the cursor flailing around the ringing phone she decides to take note, and picks it up.

“Rod, is that you?”

“It’s Lucas. Smash it.”

“What?”

“BREAK IT NOW! TRUST ME!”

0:05

0:04

0:03

Aileen draws her crowbar, and dives forward without another moment’s hesitation. She’s not confident it will fix anything, but her friend is, and she’ll gladly bet her life on that confidence. 

0:02

0:01

Aileen jumps, swinging the crowbar at the lamppost.

The meteor blazes past the window.

The light shatters, causing the illumination of the room to be bathed in red from the meteor’s glow.

0:00

The ground shakes as the meteor hits the cliff face.

Red turns to pink as the light of flames mixes with a white glow that engulfs the house.

Aileen hits the ground hard as the earth bucks beneath her feet. The air is filled with the sound of a cataclysmic explosion, rocks crumbling from the impact. A wall of fire rises slowly over the edge of her front patio, and the windows warp and shatter.

It dawns on Aileen that she must be in shock, as the world around her moves in slow motion.

Pink turns fully to white, as the glow becomes all encompassing. Aileen turns to see a large crack tear through the hallway. Instinct takes her, and she throws herself forward, scrambling on all fours. The white glow fades into a bright orange.

The floor sinks below Aileen’s feet, but she refuses to give up here. She throws herself forward with renewed determination, and with a final leap, collapses onto the other side of the crack, just as her mother’s office, the alchemiter, and everything above it falls away into the cliffs below.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alas, unlike Dave, Aileen doesn't have a ninja sibling to save her when she's running late.


	4. Rodolfo Wells

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rodolfo wonders what sort of fucked up game he's been dragged into, before deciding not to play any more.

A young man is taking a moment to sit back and catch his breath. He has just watched his friend escape the rapidly crumbling ruins of her home, and for his part in the situation feels the weight of fear pressing down upon him. The situation has escalated so rapidly he can hardly comprehend it, and he feels certain that he may have somehow ended up in the most stressful situation in all of his twenty-one years of life.

As previous chapters have hinted, the man is usually referred to as ROD, though his full name is RODOLFO WELLS. Unlike many of his friends though, he also retains the unflattering names that often plagued him as a child, such as GROTESQUE MOTORHEAD. These cruel names are typically the result of Rod’s EXCESSIVELY LARGE STATURE, caused by a minor case of GIGANTISM. 

Were you to ask Rod, he would not disagree with assertions that he is unsightly, something his friends take severe issue with despite not knowing anything about his appearance. As far as those who have seen him are concerned though, he is terrifying, standing seven feet tall and bearing a face that looks roughly chiseled from stone. His features are very angular with pale skin due to a genetic condition, and his hair is black, and rather ratty from chemicals and minor burning.

Rod tends to favor bright colors, primarily ORANGE, though as a general rule he wears them very little. His typical clothing consists of jeans and t-shirts or tank tops, and he goes through shirts very quickly. His clothes are consistently stained with oil, and because of this he has set himself on fire once. The incident has left some burn scars on his chest and shoulders, visible still due to his choice in clothing, and responsible for unease amongst many who meet him.

The fear Rod causes with his mere presence is often cause for worry amongst children and adults alike, and for that reason he prefers to stay indoors unless called out for work. This happens more often than he’d like, as the GARAGE he calls his home is far too small for most jobs. His close proximity to the ALBERTA OIL SANDS means much of his work is on machines larger than the building he works from.

Of course, today no such jobs are scheduled for him. Rod’s attention today was meant to be devoted to his trusted family member CALEB, as well as his hobby of building MOTORCYCLES. Instead he finds his focus torn between two of his online friends, one due to the peril she’s found herself in, and the other due to his sudden intrusion into said perilous situation.

Aileen still appears to be recovering from her close escape, so Rod turns his attention to the other friend who is trying to message him.

\-- goldenGauntlet [GG] began pestering automotiveCanine [AC] at 10:26 --

GG: Well that was a close one!  
GG: She… uhh, she did make it, right?  
GG: AC? Dude?  
AC: Oh! Yeah, she’s alive, no bones broken.  
AC: Sorry about that, just needed a minute.  
GG: Yes! I knew she’d make it!  
GG: It’s nice hear it from somebody watching though.  
AC: Implying you weren’t watching.  
GG: Well of course I wasn’t watching!  
GG: That would be ridiculous.  
AC: You knew something about what’s going on though.  
GG: Something being the key word.  
GG: I knew there was a lamp she needed to smash.  
GG: And I knew I needed to call her just now.  
GG: The information I had seemed to imply the two were related.  
AC: How would you know any of that?  
GG: Long story.  
GG: Shouldn’t you be looking after WV?  
AC: She’s taking a breather right now.  
AC: Actually… I think she fell asleep.  
AC: Right next to the wreckage, damn.  
GG: Wreckage?  
AC: Her house.  
GG: What happened to her house?  
AC: It’s half missing?  
GG: Holy shit!  
AC: I’m guessing your mysterious source didn’t mention that then.  
GG: Yeah, I can safely say I had no idea.  
GG: Damn, what happened to her stuff?  
AC: Her room is fine, it’s on the opposite end.  
AC: Her kitchen on the other hand… not so much.  
AC: Also the office room I put one of those game constructs in.  
GG: That sounds important.  
AC: Yeah, I think it was her mom’s room. I don’t know what I was thinking dumping a random machine in there.  
GG: Okay, that too, but I was talking more about the machine, dude!  
AC: You think so?  
GG: Why the heck wouldn’t it be?  
AC: I don’t know, I figured it did what it was supposed to already!  
AC: It made a magic lamppost appear, what else is it supposed to do?  
GG: Make other things appear, I think!   
GG: Game things.  
GG: Trying to continue without it would be like…  
GG: Like making a motorcycle without a screwdriver!  
AC: You’re a little off with that comparison.  
AC: But I see your point.  
AC: So what do we do?  
GG: I don’t think I can do more than I have already.  
GG: Most of what I know about what’s going on doesn’t really pertain to Aileen, honestly.  
GG: She probably comes up the least.  
GG: Which is irritating since she’s the only one who I actually know the appearance of.  
GG: I see everyone else running around and just wonder: “who the fuck is that?”  
AC: Ignoring the obvious question as to how you can see any of this at all…  
AC: Still waiting for suggestions as to what I can do.  
GG: Right, sorry dude.  
GG: Here’s a thought.  
GG: Can your cursor move between the two parts of the house?  
AC: I’ll check.

Rod decides to devote his attention to the problem, and puts Pesterchum aside for the moment. Using his friend’s suggestion as a starting point, he attempts to find the other half of the house in the game. His mouse scrolls over to the open hall where Aileen is still resting, and finds to his surprise that as he scrolls past the opening his cursor immediately appears in the other half of the house.

Rod expected to find a crumbling ruin, with perhaps a few things that could be salvaged, but to his shock the other half of the house is sitting completely intact at the base of the cliff. It’s also at this point that he notices the color of the light is different. The bright orange above has vanished, leaving instead a deep red. This is probably significant in some way, but Rod can’t begin to imagine just how. He chooses to ignore the color in favor of trying to figure out what to do.

AC: Okay, so I guess the other half of her house is okay!  
GG: Nice!  
AC: Unfortunately I have no idea just how far away it is though.  
AC: My mouse just seems to… switch.  
AC: And the camera angles are fixed.  
GG: So you’ll have to wait until Aileen’s awake before you can help her.  
AC: It would seem so. I’ll just have to wait here for the time being.  
GG: Well let’s at least prepare while waiting.  
AC: In my experience preparing for a situation without knowing what the situation often proves counterproductive.  
GG: So we won’t prepare for her.  
GG: Let’s get you ready to go instead.  
AC: Ready to go?  
GG: For the game, yeah.  
AC: Not playing.  
GG: What?  
AC: I’m not playing that game.  
AC: I was reluctant to begin with, but after seeing what happened to Aileen?  
AC: I’ll help her through this, sure, but I’m not putting myself through it.  
GG: …  
GG: What!?  
AC: Why is this so surprising?  
GG: Because… well, you have to play!  
GG: You’re already playing!  
AC: I’m a server, not a client.  
GG: Two sides, same coin.  
AC: Unacceptable.   
AC: As long as the client programs remain uninstalled my home will not be subjected to this.  
GG: I’ve seen you playing it.  
AC: You said already that you have no idea what we look like.  
GG: I can guess.  
GG: Out of all of my friends you’re the only one who lives above a garage.  
GG: I can probably tell you exactly what you look like.  
AC: Shut up.  
GG: Look dude, all I’m saying is, the same visions that let me save Aileen also have you in them.  
GG: I wouldn’t lie about this; you know it’s beneath me.  
AC: We’re done talking.  
GG: We’re not done until you acknowledge what needs to be done.  
GG: At which point you will realize that you still need to talk to me about what needs to be done.  
GG: You can’t escape it, I’ve seen it.  
AC: …  
AC: Your visions are bullshit.  
AC: And you’re not as perfect as you think you are.  
AC: Play your game with somebody else, brat.

Rod shuts his monitor down before he can see any more responses from his friend, before remembering that he’s supposed to be watching Aileen. Luckily he has other options, though if he’s going to keep in contact with Aileen that means the cocky prick is still going to be able to pester him.

Rod sighs as he grabs his tablet, already regretting his outburst. GoldenGauntlet is overconfident at times, but it’s never in spite. He may have been pushier than usual just now, but his visions have always meant a great deal to him. Rod knows from years spent chatting with him that the magical city he dreams of has kept him going through some tough times. Rod’s issues with his guardians have nothing on those of his friend.

All the same, the thought that one of Rod’s online friends may have discerned his appearance is terrifying enough that this is one argument that won’t be resolved any time soon. Rod pushes his regret aside easily enough, and turns his tablet on with the intention of ensuring Aileen is the only one who contacts him. 

Rod freezes before he can even open the chat client however, as he witnesses what can only be referred to as a cybernetic phenomenon. He blinks for a few moments in shock before it truly dawns on him just what he’s seeing.

The Sburb logo seems to be on his tablet. Rod definitely did not put that there, and yet… 

“Okay.” Rod shakes his head irritably. “I’m not going to lose it. There are plenty of ways this could happen.” His tablet does have file-sharing capacity with his computer after all. The program is probably just programmed to transfer automatically in such a way as to slip entirely past firewalls. There’s already plenty of evidence to suggest a group of highly skilled programmers behind this program.

“Disconcerting.” Rod muses; tapping the icon on his screen and bringing up the server program he left running on his computer. “Already installed.” 

He notices a device he’s failed to deploy, the Punch Designix, and attempts to drop it off, but finds that it requires a material other than the grist he’s been using so far. It’s probably yet another aspect of the game requiring Aileen to wake up.

Rod sighs as he rises from his chair, and makes the decision to not even bother with the game until he hears from his client player. He’ll simply find some other way to pass the time until then.

Some other way that does not involve him destroying his home for the sake of this damn game. The thought of it makes Rod shudder. His home may be cramped for somebody of his size, but it’s still his and he’s rather fond of it the way it is.

Rod’s home is divided into two parts: one for business, and the other for living. The living space is downright miniscule, consisting of two rooms. 

The room he is currently in serves as bedroom, kitchen, and living room. Half of this room is taken up by beds: a massive one for himself, which is little more than a mattress on the floor, and a smaller one for Caleb. Next to his bed is a small desk with a computer far too large for it. The computer is likely the nicest thing Rod keeps on the upper floor. Next to the door is a small counter with a stove and fridge. The room is extremely UTILITARIAN.

The other room upstairs is the bathroom, likely the cleanest room in the building. Rod maintains the room almost religiously, as the terrible plumbing in his home can be rather ludicrously temperamental. The pipes freeze on a regular basis during the winter unless he runs his equipment constantly to keep the heat going.

Deciding as usual that this rather unimpressive pair of rooms has nothing to keep his interest, Rod decides instead to head downstairs. He steps out into the hallway that connects the two upstairs rooms and moves for his garage.

Since much of his work involves driving to the client, Rod’s garage is actually rather small, only allowing for work on one vehicle at a time. With the exception of his car lift, most of his equipment is stored in his Sylladex. This leaves much of his garage space free for items relating to his hobby, MAKING JUNK ART. Rod uses power hammers, a forge, blowtorches, and even a laser cutter to twist the various old vehicle parts he accumulates into his works, which primarily look like animals or mythical creatures.

His pieces are littered throughout the yard around his home, and Rod likes to think that when people stop to stare its mostly in appreciation of his artistic sensibilities rather than confusion or fear at the mess of metal creatures in his yard. Really though the sad truth is that his art is as underappreciated as Rod is, though not quite as terrifying.

Rod notes that Caleb is absent from the house and comes to the conclusion that he must be out with the kids on the block. This tends to mean that they’ve left something to fix outside. The children are generally so frightened of Rod that they can’t approach to ask if Caleb can come out to play, so they leave something for him to fix instead as a ‘distraction’, usually a bike or a wagon, and just sneak off with Caleb instead. The logic is inherently flawed in the sort of childish way that Rod can’t help but find charming, even if he is undeniably disheartened by their fear of him.

Rod pulls the chain that holds his garage door closed, and smiles as the morning light shines through his door. Sure enough, there is one bicycle here, lying in the middle of the driveway where Rod can’t possibly miss it. The bike has had its wheel conspicuously removed, a typical ailment from a group of children always trying to find excuses to have their bikes fixed.

Rod chuckles to himself as he grabs a wrench from a small table next to the door and walks down to the bike. The sound of children laughing can be heard easily from down the street, Caleb’s low voice clearly audible. It takes all of ten seconds for the bike to be fixed, and Rod leaves it standing at the end of the driveway where the kids will be able to see it.

Rod walks back to his garage with a smile, happy to have solved at least one problem today. He stops at the door to his garage and watches as the morning sun shines into his home. Dust floats on the air and seems to fill the room with dancing lights.

Rod takes a moment to reflect on his need to clean this damn place.

Then he checks his tablet to see if Aileen has messaged him. Unfortunately the only message Rod’s received is from goldenGauntlet.

GG: My visions aren’t bullshit.  
GG: Though sometimes I wish they were.  
GG: I’ve seen a lot of what’s coming, and most of it is terrible.  
GG: It’ll take everything we have, but we’ll all pull through it.  
GG: And we’ll need you to do it.  
GG: So just remember…  
GG: God this is fucked up, I’m not going to say that.  
GG: Just…  
GG: Remember what happened to Aileen’s antlers.  
GG: There.  
GG: You’ll figure it out when the time comes.

Rod switches over to the Sburb application on his tablet and eyes the deer flying around Aileen’s room. The thing was born from a pair of antlers on a shitty wall mount… and it suddenly occurs to Rod just how strange that is, even in comparison to everything else that has happened in the past hour.

This game has done more than just tear buildings apart and call meteors. It created life. The thought unnerves Rod so much that he finds himself unable to do anything besides sit at his workbench until Aileen awakens.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I feel like if I were to become involved with Sburb without warning I might try to do the same thing as Rod, though I'd probably be thinking to myself: "there's no way it could be this easy." Denial is a hell of a drug though.


	5. Dust

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Aileen awakens to find her home in shambles.

When Aileen awakens she discovers that the blazing orange glow of flames has brightened into a brilliant golden glare. It’s painful to look at, and disorients Aileen so much that she nearly fails to realize that she seems to be back in her room.

Of course, if this is meant to be Aileen’s room then it is a strange imitation indeed, as while Aileen and her mother have always had an abundance of money building an entire room out of gold remains quite out of reach. 

All the same, the details are a match to her own room, though it seems that in this imitation her bed has not been relocated. The rest of the room remains a chaotic mess though, with the heaps of clutter still present in full force. The only thing missing from the collection is her antlers; now absent from their place on the wall, though the nail that they were balanced on remains.

Aileen pushes herself to her feet groggily, noting that she seems to have been sprawled on the floor beneath her window. In fact, looking around, the only exit to the room seems to be the windows, one set in the usual position, and the other placed on the wall where her door would normally be. Aileen takes note of this with trepidation, deciding she’d better take stock of just where she’s been taken.

Aileen turns to face the window she’s had her back to for the past minute (which in retrospect really wasn’t the smartest move), and looks out her window.

Above her is a black empty void.

Below her is a city made entirely of gold.

Holy shit, if Aileen thought her room looked bright then this city is something else. It’s an entire labyrinth of columns, halls, arches, and spires, as though somebody made an entire city entirely out of interlocked gothic cathedrals. And then poured gold all over the whole thing.

She’s reminded immediately of the golden dream city a friend of hers keeps mentioning. Somehow though when he sang his praises of this place though, she never imagined it looking so… gaudy.

The light seems to glare off of the towers and walls below, and Aileen can only look down at it for so long before it starts to burn her eyes. She steps back blinking, sitting down on her bed with a groan as her head suddenly starts to pound. Her vision darkens, as she massages her temples.

She closes her eyes to block the burning golden light out.

She awakens in the hallway of her basement, bathed in an orange glow, and choking on a cloud of dust that seems to fill the air.

“Oh cripes-” further attempts to speak fall short as Aileen chokes, and she scrambles away from the open hallway where the mess of plaster from her broken home lingers in the air. Thankfully, the dust clears as she moves further back into her house, and Aileen is able to suck in a few mouthfuls of cleaner air.

Still, the mess that’s been made of her home is not going to be solved immediately, and the dust is continuing a slow crawl into her home. Aileen moves upstairs but finds that the cloud is practically omnipresent here as well. It’s not until Aileen moves into her bathroom door, which was closed at the time of the crack, that she finds relief.

Thankfully, the water is still running here, and Aileen splashes water in her face until her complexion is less gray and grimy. For a moment or two she considers just stripping down and taking a shower, but the dust will still be clouding things when she leaves. 

Besides, while she considers Rod to be a trustworthy person, knowing he can see everything going on in her house does makes her uncomfortable with undressing. She’ll have to make do for the time being.

Aileen moves into her room next, which already faces a fine coating of dust. Still, it’s not too bad just yet, so Aileen closes her door to keep the worst of it out and starts rummaging through her closet. Eventually she digs up some old goggles from diving lessons, and a respirator from the time she was looking into home renovation (her mother put a stop to that idea before it could get very far). 

She retreats back into the bathroom to wash her face and mouth one last time before strapping her protection into place. The filters on her mask are old, but should suffice for the time being. Finally, now that she can travel her house without choking, she ventures back towards the break.

The dust is even thicker on the upper floor than it was downstairs, and Aileen notes that the walls of the dining room and sitting room seem to have fallen with the rest of the house. In its place a small section of wall the length of the break is jutting up from the ground up to Aileen’s stomach. 

Aileen turns to the sitting room, regarding the cruxtruder, still sitting solidly in the middle of the room. Her laptop still sits on the couch, and she checks it to see if there’s a message from her server player. There seems to be several messages, in fact, though Rod only seems to be responsible for a few of them.

 

\-- goldenGauntlet [GG] began pestering worthyVenture [WV] at 10:14 --

GG: Aileen, please read this!  
GG: You have to smash the lamppost!  
GG: I saw it in one of my dreams!  
GG: …I suppose that doesn’t inspire confidence.  
GG: Just trust me on this, okay.  
GG: Smash the lamp!  
GG: Uhh…  
GG: You’re smashing the lamp, right?  
GG: Did you smash it yet?  
GG: You probably haven’t read this.  
GG: I’ll call you then!  
GG: Aileen, you’re not answering your phone.  
GG: Aileen, it’s really important that you answer your phone!  
GG: Aileen!  
GG: Damnit!  
GG: Aileen?  
GG: Okay, so I heard a bunch of stuff breaking over the phone.  
GG: Sounded like the lamppost was one of those things…  
GG: some confirmation would be great though!  
GG: Ugh, okay, just forget it, I’ll ask Rod.  
GG: Message me if you’re not dead.  
GG: And please don’t be dead!  
WV: Hey, sorry, things were hectic there.  
WV: I’m okay now, awake and moving around.   
WV: I guess I didn’t move fast enough though, because the meteor broke like half of my house off.  
WV: So I’m gonna be busy figuring things out here.  
WV: We’ll talk more when I know what the fuck is going on.

 

\-- tenderConsideration [TC] began pestering worthyVenture [WV] at 10:47 --

TC: Hey, you live by Vancouver, right?  
TC: Just saw a thing on the news about some meteorite thing going on over there.  
TC: They’re talking about a politician’s home being destroyed, and I got worried they might be talking about your mom?  
TC: I mean, you’re still online so I suppose it can’t be you.  
TC: I guess I’m just nervous.  
TC: There’s been more of this stuff going on in the past few days.  
TC: A kid from my school was crushed by one of those rocks yesterday, and it’s happening more as time goes on.  
TC: And now Lucas is getting all worked up about something to do with his city.  
TC: Today is just really weird.  
TC: Sorry, just forget about it.  
TC: I’m being paranoid and jumpy.  
TC: Should get my act together.  
TC: Not like we need another PM running around, right?

 

Aileen decides to leave the second message unanswered for the moment, since it seems like telling her friend that her fears are correct would be a bad idea. For now at least. It’s definitely not the sort of thing one can keep silent for long, but she figures she should at least know what the fuck is going on.

Though leaving her hanging is hardly the way to go either, especially since she has a way of always finding out what’s going on. Looks like it’s time for half-truths and glaring omissions!

WV: Hey thanks for checking in!  
WV: I am alive and well atm, just busy with some stuff around the house.  
TC: Oh geez that’s good to hear.  
TC: All right, I’m going to go do some work of my own before I work myself any more.  
WV: Animals?  
TC: Nah, dad’s got them covered today.  
TC: I’m just gonna mess around in the kitchen. That always works wonders for my nerves.  
WV: Yeah, it definitely sounds like you could use some you time.  
WV: I’ll leave you to it.  
TC: Later!

Alright, that’s one friend successfully calmed. Mission accomplished! Now all that’s left is to talk to her server player. It takes a while to scroll past all the frenzied messages about the countdown, though she does pause to take note of the comments regarding her antlers. That would explain that deer-ghost thing, which Aileen hasn’t seen since she broke the lamppost. Finally though, she gets to the new stuff.

AC: So the good news is the other half of your house seems to be intact.  
AC: The bad news is I have no idea how far away it is.  
AC: We’ll have to wait until you can look for yourself to see just what we’re dealing with.  
AC: I uh… I made a shitty wall. Tried to block off the giant hole, but I’ve got nothing to work with.  
AC: We are fresh out of build grist. Got some extra by clearing around the hole, but it wasn’t enough.  
AC: Do you know anything about that deer thing?  
AC: Something about it just… it’s unsettling.  
WV: I don’t know a thing, sorry.  
WV: The only time I’ve seen it was when I was trying not to die.  
WV: So, you know, bigger priorities to deal with.  
WV: You probably know more than me, you saw it appear.  
AC: Yeah, I suppose that makes sense.  
WV: What’s freaking you out about it?  
AC: Just… It’s like a ghost or something, right?  
WV: Kinda looks like one, yeah.  
AC: And that doesn’t unnerve you?  
WV: Should it?  
AC: Yes. Everything about this damn game should be unnerving.  
AC: It was bad enough when it was screwing around with the laws of physics, but now it’s playing with the laws of life and death.  
AC: And our great and mystical prophet of the golden city seems to think that we’ll need that soon.  
WV: Wait, you mean Lucas?  
AC: Yes.  
WV: Well I guess that’s two more people he’s freaking out today.  
AC: Crap. I was hoping you wouldn’t believe him.  
AC: I really want him to be full of shit.  
WV: Unfortunately I don’t think we’re in a position to dismiss him after he saved my ass from death by meteor.  
WV: Besides…  
WV: I kinda just had a dream about a city made of gold.  
AC: You’re bullshitting me.  
WV: At this point, I’m starting to wish that were true.  
AC: So his warning about death…  
WV: We may need to watch our backs.  
AC: No.  
AC: NO.  
AC: I’m not allowing this.  
WV: Rod, come on.  
AC: If this game puts me at risk…  
AC: If it puts Caleb at risk  
AC: no.  
AC: I’m done.  
WV: What do you mean?  
AC: I’m not playing this game anymore.  
AC: I’m going to get Caleb inside where it’s safe, and then I’m going to forget this ever happened.  
WV: But… you can’t just…  
WV: After what happened to me you’re going to just leave me?  
AC: I’m sorry Aileen, really I am.  
AC: But my home, my job, Caleb…  
AC: They’re all I have.  
AC: After everything I’ve sacrificed to get to where I am I will not sacrifice them.  
AC: Not even for you.  
AC: Good luck.  
WV: Rod, wait please, I can’t do this alone.  
WV: I need you if I’m going to get through this Rod.  
\-- automotiveCanine [AC] has logged off! --

WV: ROD PLEASE!

“FUCK!” Aileen screams in frustration as she slams her laptop closed. Without a server player, she’ll hardly stand a chance. Rod’s assistance was the one thing she really had going for her in this fucked up game she’s playing. Now that he’s abandoned her…

Aileen groans as she stands up and brushes the dust off of her clothes. She can’t fault Rod for the choice he’s made, not really. As easy as it would be to claim she’d never do the same, she also knows that she has far less to lose. Her home, her possessions, even the clothes on her back are all primarily things given to her. Rod gave his blood, sweat, and tears to ensure that he and Caleb lived as good a life as possible, and even that hardly amounted to much. He fought for everything he has right now with every fiber of his being, and Aileen knows what it all means to him.

It still hurts like hell though.

She’ll have to try begging him again later. Rod may be panicking right now, but once he’s had time Aileen is sure he’ll come around. He’s not a monster, even if he claims to look like one. Aileen is fighting for her life here, and even if she’s never met Rod, she knows she means more to him than just a voice on the Internet.

In the meantime, she’s just going to have to figure some things out for herself.

She starts by going to the safety wall Rod made, and peering down to see if the rest of her house is visible. The dust is still thick though, and all she can really see is a soft yellow light. A similar light is also visible above though, so she assumes the light is from something other than her house. Another game thing perhaps?

Well, either way, the other half of her house can only be in one place, so Aileen decides one way or another she’s going to need to come up with a way to climb down. She probably has some old gear in her closet, given her packrat tendencies.

She nods to herself, and starts to head for her bedroom, only to stop when she hears something clatter behind her. She turns slowly, eyeing the open space in her wall with trepidation. If more of her house starts falling she is going to be pissed.

A shape appears over the edge of the wall, difficult to discern through all the dust. It looks like a tree, but Aileen could swear she didn’t see any plants growing in the cliff wall.

She steps closer, trying to make the shape out through the dust that coats her goggles, and finds that there are more of these plant things than she thought. Six of them, in fact, all poking over the wall…

Aileen freezes as she realizes the growths are not plants, but antlers, arranged in three pairs behind the wall. “What the hell are you?” She mutters, thinking for a moment that perhaps the deer ghost from before somehow made friends.

Any such pleasant thoughts come to an abrupt halt as the antlers seem to react to Aileen’s voice. She’s barely had time to leap back to safety before three small white creatures with antlers come flying over the edge of the wall and into her living room. Her confusion would be immense if it wasn’t for the words appearing over their heads, identifying them as salt imps.

“Of course.” Aileen reasons, eying the wickedly pointed antlers with trepidation, “It’s a game right? So it’s only natural that there are enemy monsters to kill. This is just part of the experience.”

Of course it comes as no comfort to Aileen when she finds all three pairs of antlers bearing down upon her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Not the most effective cliffhanger, I agree, but this chapter was already at a good length, and throwing in a fight scene on top of that would be ludicrous. Hard as it can be, I do have to draw the line somewhere.
> 
> So something I've realized I might have screwed up is how the sprite works. It's something I forgot about completely, but the rules of sprites early on seem to imply that sprites are stuck in a ball form until either entering the medium or being prototyped a second time. I forgot this was a thing, mostly because I was thinking of Becsprite, who just breaks that rule entirely. I don't know if it's a first guardian thing or what, but his ghost form just fucks with the system, as well as my head.
> 
> In other news, Rod's attempts to escape Sburb's wrath grows more and more bizzare.


	6. Strife

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Aileen faces imps. A carapacian judges. The uninitiated learn of their peril.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Jegus this took 4 months. I have... no good reason. Writers block, Zelda, Persona, work nonsense... I just let a whole lot of shit distract me from writing for a very long time.

Those reading who remember Aileen’s introduction will likely recall that she has experience in a great deal of combat related interests. So when three antlered salt imps come charging at Aileen, she is far from helpless. Unfortunately for her though, upon being attacked she finds herself immediately thinking back on her boxing days.

The first punch Aileen throws hits the middle imp in the skull, causing it to jerk back in pain. And that sudden recoil sends its antlers cutting straight into her arm. 

“Ah, shit!” Aileen screams as she withdraws with long bloody gashes on her arm. The imp she’s hit steps back as well nursing its head, prompting the other imps to cautiously hold back. 

Aileen takes the opportunity to inspect her injuries. They’re thankfully not too deep, but with all the dust in the air she’ll have to be careful about cleaning them, assuming she lasts against these creatures.

Unfortunately, Aileen’s strife experience mainly involves hand-to-hand combat, and she is not ready to try punching these imps again any time soon. Kicking them could work better, but diminished risk does not mean zero risk. If her legs end up injured she’ll be in even worse trouble than she is already.

The imps are regrouping after their leader’s injury, and Aileen swiftly finds herself confronted once more by a wall of spikes. This time, rather than approach simultaneously the imps attack one by one. It would normally be ineffective, but with Aileen unable to defend right now she has her hands full dealing with the tactic.

The first two she manages to side step, but the third one takes a flying leap at her, and she has to dive to the ground to evade.

That’s when she remembers her crowbar. Effective as a tool, certainly, but as a weapon?

Well, Leon would probably approve. He holds Gordon Freeman in very high regard.

Aileen figures she might as well see if Half-Life had the right idea.

The next imp to jump at Aileen takes a crowbar to the face, hitting the wall and exploding into a mess of blue and white pieces. Some sort of loot system, probably, but time enough to worry about that in a moment.

The next two imps charge one after the other, and Aileen swings the crook of her crowbar like a baseball bat. The creatures shriek in panic as their antlers are caught, and she throws them into the wall with a triumphant roar. They collapse to the ground in a heap, antlers tangled together, and Aileen’s final swing kills both simultaneously.

“Yes! Screw you, you little bastards!” Aileen crows triumphantly as she gathers the loot the imps dropped. It seems to mostly consist of blue items called build grist, that look similar to fruit gushers, and small translucent blocks of halite, which Aileen successfully identifies as a type of salt crystal due to her vast knowledge of useless trivia!

Of course, there is more to be gained from this fight than just the spoils of war. Aileen notes after collecting the item drops that this fight has actually managed to advance her towards her next level on the Echeladder! Her wide variety of interests have allowed her to advance quite far already, but this fight seems to have been worth quite a bit, advancing her to the title of Arc Refractor! Which honestly doesn’t make a damn bit of sense, but whatever, progress is progress!

Aileen twirls her crowbar with a grin, before pausing to note the dull throb of pain coming from her injuries. She really should take care of-

>Attend to your unopened package, boor!

-That box her mom sent her! She had almost forgotten about it with all that’s been going on! She left it on her bed… which means it’s probably on her roof. Hmm… Maybe she’ll just deal with that later…

>Package! Boor! Now!

Nah, Aileen’s not doing anything important. Injuries are nothing compared to the gift she received from her precious mother. Her arm twinges in protest, but never let it be said that Aileen does not have her priorities straight!

Aileen heads out to the part of her balcony still attached to her half of the house, and looks around to see if she can find anything out about her surroundings. The dust is starting to settle, but other than a few brighter points of orange in the middle of all the dust she really can’t make out much new. 

Well, her ladder was in the garage, which has vanished along with the rest of the house, so Aileen is going to have to get creative if she’s going to get on the roof. She decides instead to climb onto the rail around her balcony, and after a few precarious moments of steadying herself, makes a daring leap!

There is a brief, frantic moment of scrabbling before Aileen manages to swing a leg up and hook her foot on the gutter. She pulls herself up easily from there, and moves to recover her package!

“I know all about Jeopardy, thanks mom.” Aileen grumbles as she takes the box from the bed and stalks back to the edge of the roof. She wishes briefly that she had one of those captchalogue decks that can index larger items, but alas, her bed seems to be trapped on the roof for the time being.  
She drops down to the deck with little trouble, picking at the tape on the package as she moves back inside. Finally, she opens the box, and looks inside. There is a small card on top that reads simply: ‘To avoid something or someone with a sudden quick movement.’

Aileen stares blankly at the card for a second, before answering tentatively “What is dodging?”

A flash of grey flies at Aileen’s face, and she throws herself out of the way just in time. A massive stone head erupts from the box, seeming to balloon out as it is exposed to the miasmic cloud of dust that fills the air. Short neatly combed hair, a pair of glasses, wizened wrinkles, and a confident, almost coy smile are revealed as the force of ejection from the box causes the figure to lift high into the air.

>A beautiful work. One such as you cannot comprehend its majesty.

Aileen gazes up in stupefaction as a giant bust of Alex Trebek smirks down at her, seeming to be almost suspended in midair. A thought occurs to her: “if this thing lands like this my house is going to be messed up even worse than it is already.”

Fortunately for Aileen this does not come to pass. Just as the bust begins its descent, the deer ghost from earlier floats underneath it. Aileen gapes as the deer pauses, and seems to stare up in confusion. An innocent, mindless animal such as this has no idea what to make of such a phenomenon. Alex Trebek is merciless in contrast, crashing down upon the poor deer with brutal force. 

There is a flash of light. The deer ghost vanishes.

When Aileen regains her vision, only Trebucksprite remains. He floats regally above her, clad in a suit and tie, the wise, elderly face of Alex Trebek now crowned with a pair of elegant antlers, his ears long and bestial. His face is stern, but kind, with the confident twinkle in his eye that only an accomplished television game show host can achieve.

A voice rings throughout the house, emanating from thin air. “And now, here is the host of Sburb: Alex Trebuck!” But Aileen has no need for this announcement. She knows what this magnificent creature is called. Somehow she’s always known.

Trebucksprite. Her guiding light. This is a man without peer, sure to help her in her time of need. Indeed, as he looks down upon her he smiles kindly, opening his mouth to speak. Aileen’s eyes glimmer with hope.

“This unstable compound often sees use as a bleaching agent, though it also makes an effective antiseptic.”

Aileen grins as she looks down at her arm, noting the now filthy cuts still bleeding from her fight with the imp. “What is hydrogen peroxide?”

“Correct! I suggest you make effective use of that chemical now, for there are many more trials to come!”

Aileen moves wordlessly to her bathroom, overcome by Trebucksprite’s timely wisdom. With this man on her side Aileen now has a chance.

Ten minutes later Aileen curses her luck as she realizes that most of Trebuck’s answers are made useless by the fact that SHE DOESN’T KNOW WHAT ANYTHING IN SBURB IS CALLED.

“Fuck my life!”

“Your answer must be in the form of a question!”

 

Years in the future, but not many, the shape of the world is fundamentally different. The planet Earth, once teeming with life, is now little more than a scorched ruin. Where once there were forests, there is now only dust. Where once there were mountains there are towering sand dunes. Where once there were oceans there is now only swamp, the vast depths laid bare by the same heat that burned dry land away. 

The Pauperized Authority is not so easily slain, however. He has wandered this broken world since its demise was fresh and the fires were still burning. He traversed deserts baked into glass and the skeletal remains of cities, picking the bones of the dead for sustenance (or rather, raiding what was left of their pantries). He crossed the mires of the Pacific, and in doing so met a Desolate Cartographer, busy mapping the new world. 

The man was quite polite, for a Dersite, a rather interesting contrast to the Authority’s position as an exceptionally rude Prospitian. And while he stayed dedicated to his task as a wanderer of the world, he did direct the Authority to a suitable location for a shelter. A great white tower, standing high above the sands, untouched by the devastation.

The Cartographer visited this tower in the early days of his exile, however, and in the decades since that time much has changed. The tower has crumbled into ruins, swept away with the dust. All that remains now is a great dome of white metal, still large enough to serve as a shelter for a lone carapacian. 

The dome seems perfect for a lengthy survival scenario, proving home to a stock of food, to be carefully rationed, as well as entertainment in the form of a set of screens, though only one can be accessed. There is a young woman on the screen walking through a ruined building, one whom the Authority has commanded from time to time via keyboard. Just recently he ordered her to acquisition some rather exquisite artwork of a wise gentleman, which was ruined rather spectacularly by the unwanted intrusion of an antlered phantom.

The Pauperized Authority really is quite furious about that particular incident. The aesthetics of the bust he tracked down are rendered completely inadequate with the addition of antlers and a ghost butt. There’s really no salvaging the artistic integrity of this. And the Pauperized Authority would know, as when it comes to matters of artistic integrity, he has long been regarded as the leading knowledgeable source of knowledge on the matter.

The Authority steams over the utter debasement of this work of art for several long minutes, before deciding that he can abide by the image of this distasteful travesty no longer. He clearly needs to remove this image from his screen in the most decisive way possible.

The Pauperized Authority accesses the computers profile functions, and adds Aileen Walker to his block list.

The screen goes out.

A giant block of marble rises from the middle of the floor.

The Authority blinks as he regards the appearance of this new entity in confusion. That was not a typical computer function. Still, the Pauperized Authority sees here an opportunity to right a grievous wrong. This will be his chance to retake what has been stolen from him. This will be the last time that an antlered monstrosity relieves the authority of his assets.

 

helmedBloodline [HB] responded to memo

HB: hi  
TA: Hey HB, how’s it going?  
HB: good  
HB: u?  
TA: I’m doing great, thanks!  
GG: Hey HB, what are you doing today?  
HB: Gardening.  
HB: Training.  
HB: Usual.  
GG: How about taking some time to help your good friends with something super important?  
TC: You’re serious about inviting all of us, huh?  
GG: Of course!  
HB: ???  
TA: He wants you to play a computer game.  
GG: Not a game. The Game.  
GG: Capitalized for significance.  
GG: SBURB. The game of new beginnings.  
GG: Creation of a new universe, ascension of gods, power over time and space.  
HB: Pass.  
GG: Not you too!  
TA: I told you he’d say no!  
HB: Games = Time wasted.  
HB: Also: I’m broke.  
GG: Oh come on!  
GG: This is not a waste of time, people, it’s important!  
DD: He’s right you know.  
DD: SBURB has been one of the most anticipated games out there for months now!  
DD: Also it’s free.  
HB: Profit?  
DD: I dunno, it’ll have DLC, probably. Or micro transactions.  
HB: Regardless. Time waste.  
DD: Buzzkill.  
HB: Rude.  
GG: Come on, I wasn’t kidding when I said this was important!  
GG: We’re talking about the end of the world here! Death by meteor apocalypse!  
TA: Wait, meteor?  
HB: Meteorite.  
TA: Right, thank you.  
TA: Anyways, haven’t there been a lot of stories of that stuff in the news lately?  
DD: I don’t watch the news.  
TA: Yeah I don’t really either.  
GG: I don’t.  
HB: Same  
HB: Aileen?  
GG: She’s busy.  
TA: Okay, just looked it up.  
TA: And we’ve been living under a rock or something, because this seems to be happening everywhere.  
TA: Like, people are dying to these things.  
TA: And nobody can do anything about it, because nobody knows where they’re coming from.  
DD: Useless pricks.  
DD: This is why you don’t trust the authorities.  
GG: Shit…  
HB: Sad.  
GG: The price of oblivion.  
DD: What?  
GG: It’s all coming down.  
GG: The end of the world.  
TA: Wait, you’re saying that your game is connected to this?  
GG: I… I think so.  
DD: Games can’t do that, morons.  
HB: Rude but correct.  
GG: Are you sure?  
GG: Because Aileen thought SBURB was harmless as well.  
GG: And now she’s one of those stories on the news.  
HB: What.  
TA: SHE’S DEAD!?  
GG: Uhh, shit, no!  
GG: She’s alive; she messaged me a few minutes ago.  
GG: But her house is gone.  
GG: Or, like, half of it I guess?  
GG: She’s alive and well though, sorry.  
GG: Worded that poorly.  
DD: No shit dude!  
GG: Sorry!  
HB: Not okay.  
GG: I know, that was stupid.  
TA: It’s all right man, just be more careful.  
TA: Anyways, I’m going to call up some friends of mine; all this meteorite stuff has me nervous.  
TA: I’ll leave this open in case anything… uh… apocalyptic happens.  
TA: Keep me posted if anything happens to Aileen.  
GG: Of course.  
GG: I’ll let you know when we need you.  
HB: Bye.  
TA: Later.  
DD: When we need him?  
HB: The Game?  
GG: It really is important.  
HB: I see.  
GG: Do you really?  
HB: No.  
HB: But investigation merited.  
HB: We’ll talk later.  
DD: Cool, you do your research thing. We’ll be kicking ass.  
GG: Not just yet.  
GG: First Rod has to get back to me.  
DD: Since when does he play games?  
GG: He usually doesn’t.  
GG: But this time he won’t have a choice.  
GG: This game is his only hope.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Trebucksprite. My proudest creation. Regal yet absurd, wise yet oh so very stupid.


End file.
